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Sex & Baby Boomers
By Carol Itoh
I sat across the booth from my friend and co-worker Annie picking at my chicken salad too stunned by her confession to eat. Looking wide eyed and shocked I'm sure I asked one more time "You did what?" "Keep your voice down!" she chafed looking around the restaurant. "You heard me; I'm think I'm having an affair." "You THINK! What does that mean?" She went on to explain how a man where we both happen to work and she had started out innocently flirting but too quickly he got serious and asked her to consider an affair. His adult and mature approach intrigued her. He had presented it to her like a business deal. I want you and if you ever decide you want me too just let me know. They shared a kiss. Than a few touches here and there. Than one afternoon in a locked and empty office it exploded into a partial sexual contact. Not completed, but sex begun. Coitus Interrupts! This would not be so astounding except that Annie has was in her early fifties. So was the man so infatuated. They were both married, bored, and these seemingly passionless people found what they both thought would never occur....... attraction to another person. I looked at my friend, we were so pretty in our youth, but that was twenty years ago. Here sat my friend being positively giddy over her little afternoon tryst. Suddenly I didn't recognize her.
"Annie, you are past the thinking part. You're acting on your impulses." I warned her to stop a minute and think of her husband. My friend was married to a very successful man and very nice man at that. Even Annie had to admit he would never do this behind her back. Why was she doing this? It was not like her to risk everything this way. I know the man involved as well and when she revealed is name I almost fell off my chair. What??? He was the last man I would have expected to instigate such a thing. He was stern, proper, professional and just the kind of man one would never dream to make a move on a woman not his wife. I made her promise not to see him again without taking me with her as insurance, since she seemed to not be able to control herself, as we parted for the day. She promised. If she could not control herself than I would help her by never letting her be alone with him.
On the drive home all I could think of was my best friend and her new special friend. Close in age it made me wonder if this a middle age identity crisis she was going through? Was her marriage not what it appeared? Could I be susceptible to something similar in a few years? I remember what she had said about how it started. She said that she had no thought of another man but when alone with him something happened... something unknown to her. Like fate...or karma. As if they were meant to be. The feelings were stronger than they were. She said they had discussed how much they both had to loose and how they know it was wrong and they would never do it again. But as soon as they were alone....BAM....it overtook them and they were at it again. I just can't see my level headed friend doing something so reckless. Not at this stage in her life when she had so much to lose. She and her husband had spent a life time building a financially and emotionally secure future for themselves.
I stopped at a local bookstore with a coffee shop for a cup of tea and to clear my head before going home to my own husband. I didn't know if I should discuss Annie's personal issue with him yet but I was very shaken by this entire event. Annie's mid-life crisis was having a profound effect up on me. I know my marriage is rock solid but I bet so does Annie's husband and the other man's wife. I wonder if their spouses have a clue? I began to wonder if it happened to me would I have a clue? Shaking my head as if to clear my thoughts I made a decision. I would talk it over with my husband tonight. I wanted everything in the open, all worries and issues on the table for discussion. To me it seemed that would be the only way to make sure neither of us was keeping any secrets. Later that night after dinner my husband surprised me my siding with Annie and her special friend on this issue. WTF??? To me it was a question of morality. But to him it was a question of personal ethics. Again, WTF??? His explanation to me was when a man works and fights to build a nice life to have at the end and then he looks at his wife one day near that end and realizes they are living separate lives he feels he has failed in some small way. He wonders what it was all for. His wife has no real interest in him and she enjoys her friends more. The truth is the love probably died years ago but in raising the children and building careers neither seemed to notice. He finds he is lonely and feeling in need of recapturing a little of his youthful passions before he dies. An attractive woman comes along and shows him a little personal attention, smiles at him, really notices him as a man, and he starts to feel again the passions of youth. He would have to be made of stone not to react. I looked at my husband with as if he had grown two heads. Is there an Old Boys Club Handbook somewhere? You guys have an explanation for everything another man does. I told him getting a little upset. I never dreamed he would take this position. I just knew he would be as outraged as I was. But he wasn't. He had heard all this before, way too many times he had said. "How do I know you will not do this to me?" I was almost crying at this point. He took me in him arms to told me that Paul Newman had it right all along. Why go out for hamburger when you've got steak at home! As long as you keep doing that thing you do I ain't going nowhere! He explained. I felt better but I am certainly not going to turn a blind eye to him either. I love him and I trust him and I fully intend to keep giving him plenty of steak at home. After all, he's just a man. But let this be a warning. One is never too old to be tripped up. In truth Annie is not my first friend to be caught up in the whirlwind of a sudden and unexpected passion. The fact is lots of my friends have had affairs. Nothing new really, it's just in this case it's the personalities of the two involved that shook me. But the over fifty crowd is quite the randy group it appears. What a horny bunch they are. This age group has the most fascinating tales to tell of sex throughout their life.....just one adventure after another from the most unexpected people you can imagine. Doctors, attorneys, CEOs of companies, Nurses, teachers, professors, cooks, waitresses, wherever they have ended up they have the best sex stories to tell. So if you like to hear great tales of great sex lives ask your fifty-sixty year old age group. They have the best stories to tell. And apparently a lot of them are still working on those stories too. Note to the young people who think they are the only ones running having great sex. Well, I hate to be the one to burst your bubbles but there are plenty of grey haired, over-weight, stern-looking, wrinkly, over-the-hill folks out there wearing spectacles, Dockers pulled way up, pocket protectors, long skirts, rolled up hose, flat shoes, and granny panties sexing up a storm! Oh yeah, talking nasty to one another, banging like rabbits and cheating like no tomorrow. This younger generation has nothing on the Baby Boomers except we are more practiced and better at hiding it. So to you Generation Y, or whatever you are, the next time you are in some stuffy old establishment and think Good Lord! I would rather be dead than be that old! Think again, those old folks are probably getting more and having better sex than you are!
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Contributor's Note
Generation Y or X or whatever, thinks if you are over forty you are too old to think about having sex. Or maybe just too old to even function but let me tell you a thing or two about the Baby Boomers and how we roll!
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This intel first appeared on: http://hubpages.com
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This intel was contributed by Carol Itoh
Carol Itoh
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May, 2012
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